Friday, October 4, 2013

It's Been a Month...

...since my last update.  One.whole.month.  I can remember when I updated my blog daily.
I said that I wasn't going to be one of those moms who abandons her blog once the baby arrives.  I guess I was wrong!  I miss writing and am going to make more time in my day to capture my thoughts.  It's like free therapy.

Elliana has grown up so much.  She's rolling over from back to tummy now, reaching for me and her bottle, and laughing and smiling all of the time.  She's a happy baby as long as I'm around!  To say that she's a bit attached to me is an understatement.  I am so blessed to be staying at home with her, but I do need her to be around other people as well.

I honestly have no idea how other SAHMs do it.  They always look like they just have it all together.  I'm lucky to brush my teeth and shower each day.  I choose whether it's more important to eat or clean while Ellie naps.  Heavens, we're still not sleeping through the night and have begun waking every two hours again. It's not been fun at all!  I often find myself feeling so guilty to have prayed and prayed for this little person when I'm crying because I just-need-a-break.  I don't know if it's just me or the PPD making me crazy.  I was in hopes that my depression would have lessened by now but it's still a daily struggle.

Nothing about motherhood has been what I expected.  I knew that each day would come with it's own challenges, but I did not envision severe acid reflux, early teething, possible renal refulx, EEGs, EKGs, upper GIs, catheter bladder samples, rectal exams, and multiple blood draws (including a cranium draw) in the first four months of Ellie's birth. We've definitely had some scares and issues with our little girl's health, but I do rely on the ultimate Healer.

I haven't seen my blog as a priority of my free time, but I see now how much I have missed this place.  I still read all of your blogs and love keeping up with the journeys that everyone is in.  To all of you still in the trenches, I am praying with you to achieve your FOREVER FAMILY.