Tuesday, April 3, 2012

This isn't fair

"The fair comes once a year, stays about a week, and then it's gone."  -Rachel Krebs

This cycle is driving me crazy.  For about five days now, I've felt cramps and been sure that AF is on her way.  My temperature has made NO sense at all.  It typically nose dives a few days after my last Provera.  I'm now 6 days past my last pill.  Even now as I type I swear that I feel cramps again.

I already called and cancelled my appointment.  As fairness goes, I'm sure that AF will show up this afternoon.  If I start in the next few days, I'm sure that I can make my appointment for Friday morning.  Brandon was supposed to go to Huntsville, but cancelled .  At least I won't have to go to the appointment alone.  

This whole situation has reminded me of Infertility's unpredictability.  Who would have known that it would take 3 HSGs and 2 surgeries to get my uterus "right" for baby making.  I've had 3 cancelled IUI cycles in less than a year.  At the end of the day, none of this is fair.  It's not fair for anyone to have to endure.  I just have to trust that this is part of the plan.

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As for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more.
Psalm 71:14